A secret report, suppressed by US defence chiefs and obtained by The Observer, warns that major European cities will be sunk beneath rising seas as Britain is plunged into a ‘Siberian’ climate by 2020. Nuclear conflict, mega-droughts, famine and widespread rioting will erupt across the world.

Missive from Toller, stuck in Oxford endlessly researching people’s brains: Hullo dude. I went on a course. A personal skills development course. Teaching networking, teamwork, and career-structuring, for a week, as part of our PhD transferable-skills program. CUNTING FUCKERS BASTARD WANKERS NAUSEA-INDUCING HITLERITE COWRAPING FUCKERS. Full of this management consultancy bullshit, because obviously there are…

Evil Genius Hoaxes

1. Title Evil Genius 2. Strap 3. Details 4. Developer Box 5. Body copy 6. Press Pass boxout 7. Boxouts 8. Callouts 9. Images 10. Captions A slap from a studded glove wakes me with a start. The room is tar black, and I appear to be hanging from my arms. “Funny”, I think “I…

1. Title Evil Genius 2. Strap 3. Details 4. Developer Box 5. Body copy 6. Press Pass boxout 7. Boxouts 8. Callouts 9. Images 10. Captions A slap from a studded glove wakes me with a start. The room is tar black, and I appear to be hanging from my arms. “Funny”, I think “I…