When I moved flat on wednesday, I neglected to bring a duvet or pillows. I also forgot I’d left my sleeping bag with Maria in Bath. Hence, since then, I’ve been sleeping in the nud, as is my wont, with the window wide open and no covering. The neighbours must have had an eyeful…

Surprisingly, I caught a cold. I am now sick as a dead parrot. Well, not quite.

However, this has allowed me to explore my surroundings today, now I’ve recovered a bit. I’ve been hacking back the weeds in the garden and I sat down and thought “ah, back to nature.” Then I looked around and tried to spot the nature. Fence? No. Stone flags? Machined, no. Gravel? Nah? Plants? All ornamental, bred for man. Weeds? Thriving on man’s by-product. Sunlight by which I see the world? Filtered through poisoned atmosphere and glasses covered with dust & dead skin… hum.

I’m going back inside, where I can be near comfortable artificiality.

(Seriously, the gardens brilliant. You’re all invited whenever you want to come and have beer & barbie. That includes the stalkers, mkay?)