Everything you ever wanted to know about crisps, but were too fat to ask. Strap 25 I can’t be arsed writing a strap. What follows is a boring story about… crisp! Yay! woo woo! body 500 Two small babies. Eight bags of sugar. That’s how much you, Joe Public, eat in crisps per year; a…

Crisps. Strap 25 body 500 Two small babies. Eight bags of sugar. That’s how much you, Joe Public, eat in crisps per year; a german eats twice that. A man in Texas once ate ten times that. And the list of delicious deep-fried statistics goes on. But one thing is for certain; we don’t know…

Bought poetry today. Last night speaking plain (primogenitor: red wine) caused me problems (Sorry Mr Gillen!) so, upon remembering a desire for Auden and Eliot, I thought softening the betoothed tongue with dulcet vocab a “good thing.” Went out and wasted money (what am I to spend it on – candles, wine and books?) on…

Two types of twitching a welcomed this eve: the first is a memory of yesterday, of looking out across a club floor, where a potato band were playing, with recognisable naíf faces you could read every day of faked history from, and seeing that floor full of the spasmodically twitching heads of people who didn’t…

]On the subject of old bloody bloom, so steeped in’t that to go on is easier than to go back, my sanguinne obsession has taken up apace. Apart from using White Blood Cells as a metaphor for death (skullish colour, consuming phagocytes, etc.) in my copy, I also started the day with a bloody mary,…